And More From That Beloved 4th Grade

And something a little lighter from the 4th grade this week, lest you think I dwell on the negative side of things. Well, had I been a different person, this could have been interpreted negatively. But the more I think of this, the more I laugh.

Before I begin, though, let me first do something:



WARNING: CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR THE YOUNGER CROWD.



Zoe brought home her STAR/guided reading book yesterday. Just for the record, the book is called The Year of Secret Assignments*, by Jaclyn Moriarty. I have never read the book, nor had I ever heard of it. Zoe walks up to me and says, "Mom, what does this mean?" I take the book from her and read on page 41, "I have a lot of dreams about sex. I mean dreams about what I think sex is like. I think it must be good."

I looked at Zoe, but I couldn't speak. Really, I was speechless! Not because I didn't want to tell her what it meant, or thought it was weird she was asking. I was so flummoxed that she was coming home, from school, with a book like this, that I just couldn't talk. I said, "Wait a minute honey," and I paged through the book.

These sentences are what I found before I stopped looking:

Page 35: "And you think I'm wetting myself because your daddy's a partner in a law firm. Bite me, baby."

Page 26: "Dear Cassie: Eat shit and die, private school slag."

Page 24: "F*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*k me."

Page 19: "You should send me some dope and I should sell it. Or use it." "...It would be a bit like drug trafficking. I've heard that Brookfield has a marijuana plantation instead of a sport oval."

My friend found a reference to a "blow job" and "getting into his pants" somewhere else in the book.

I called said friend, and asked if she had looked at the book carefully. At that point, she had not. I decided to call the teacher. I am providing the best transcript I can of that conversation. Let me just say that she was in a meeting at the time with 2 of the other 4th grade teachers, so I started out differently than I would have if she had just been in her classroom. Let me also say that I have peppered her with questions and a few emails (for clarification purposes) so she might not have been thrilled to hear from me.


Me: Hi Mrs. A, this is Zoe and Talia's mom.
Mrs. A: Oh hi. How are you? (There might have been silent eyerolling when I
identified myself.)
Me: I am sorry to bother you, but I have a question regarding the guided
reading book that Zoe brought home. I can call you later or email you about it,
if you are busy.
Mrs. A: Well, is your question short?
Me: Yes. I wanted to let you know that I don't think the reading is
appropriate for this age. Let me read this passage to you. (I read the sentence
from p. 41 to her.)
Mrs. A: OH MY GOODNESS! IT SAYS THAT?!?
Me: Yes, it does.
Mrs. A: [To the other 2 teachers in the room] It talks about sex! I had no
idea. I have not read that book yet.



At that point, a secondary conversation goes on between Mrs. A and the other teacher. We were still on the phone, so of course, I can hear it.

Mr. S: Well aren't you supposed to have read the book?!

Mrs. A: Well I can't read all of them! It was in the book
room! They should be safe if they are from the book room!


To be fair, I agree with both of them.

In any case, the kids will be changing books! Mrs. A actually called the principal herself to tell him what happened. I appreciate that she kept him in the loop. I never thought to call him, but another parent might have in the same situation.

This morning I read a few pages from the book while having some coffee. It really is an older teen novel, most likely young adult, not a K-5 book. I don't know how it got in the book room, but I am guessing they ship those books somewhere else.

Mistakes happen. I just keep laughing about this one!

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